I have been debating about whether or not I should post a 20 week pregnancy update beacause I honestly don’t have a lot of positive things to say. Let’s just say it has been so rough. However, I do want to always be honest about my thoughts and feelings and I am guessing someday I will look back and be glad I documented a few things! I would like to preface this by saying if you are going through infertility right now you may not want to read this. It actually took my husband and me two years to get pregnant with this little one so I do have a small taste of wanting a baby desperately and not being able to get pregnant. Also, no matter how hard this pregnancy is, or how much I have to go through I would do it again in a heart beat for this baby and I am so so grateful that I am able to be pregnant and carry our precious little boy!
At around 18 weeks I really started to notice a difference with my nausea. Finally! It has gotten so much better and I am so so thankful! I still throw up every morning no matter what, but after I eat breakfast and take a zophran I am good to go! Thankfully I am only needing to take one pill a day and it seems to do the trick. I have tried going off of it several times, but am hit with the nausea so I guess for now I will take the pill!
I honestly don’t have any cravings right now. Every once in a while something will sound really good, but that happens when I am not pregnant! So nothing too intense! I still get grossed out sometimes, but the food aversions have gotten so much better!
It’s a boy! We found out about 5 weeks ago at one of those ultrasound places that do early gender determination! I literally could not wait until my 20-week scan to find out what the baby was! Also, apparently at my doctor’s office they only let one other adult in the room for ultrasounds and I really wanted Olivia and Clara to be there so this worked out perfect!
Since we already have our two precious girls Michael and I definitely were hoping for a boy! We would have been thrilled with another girl, but we both grew up with sisters and brothers so we thought it would be so fun for the girls to have a brother! I totally predicted wrong on both of my girls, so I kept quiet about what I thought the gender was. However, I am not going to lie I did have several feelings that it was a boy! Olivia had been saying it was a boy literally since we told her we were having a baby. She has been so adamant about it and would not even entertain the thought of it being a girl. When we would ask her what she thought the baby was she would say, “it’s a boy!” And then we would be like, “well what if it is a girl? Will you still be excited?” And she would always respond by saying, “yep, but it’s not a girl it’s a boy!” So funny! Clara seemed to just say what Olivia did so she was convinced that it was a boy too! They both were just thrilled at the thought of having a brother! Although our sweet Clara is 4 and definitely used to being the baby so sometimes during fits she would scream, “I hate the baby, I don’t want to have another baby.” Haha. Poor little thing! It will definitely be a bit of an adjustment for her, but she will be such a good big sister!
Sophia was able to come with us to the ultrasound because Michael was still in Oregon and wanted the girls to tell him! On the way to the ultrasound place Olivia said, “I don’t know why we are doing this mom, I already told you it’s a boy!” So confident! Well, sure enough it’s a baby boy!! The girls were freaking out with excitement and we did get several “I told you sos!” While I wasn’t surprised, I was almost in denial. A little boy!! I really can’t describe how excited I am! I wanted my girls to have a little brother so badly because I love my brothers so much. They are so fun! And I have heard so much about the special bond between moms and little boys and I wanted to experience that so bad! Michael of course was beyond thrilled when he found out! Moral of the story: we are all SO SO excited to have a baby boy join our family soon! I am already shopping like crazy and can not get enough of all things baby boy!
20 week anatomy scan:
We just had our 20-week ultrasound and everything looked great! The ultrasound tech was trying to get pictures of his spine and everytime he would think he got a good shot, baby boy would flip over! Needless to say it took a few tries! It was also so cute to see him just kicking away in there and moving his little hands all around! It’s amazing the love I already feel for this little guy and he isn’t even here yet! We are so glad that he is healthy and strong and pray every day that he continues to be so!
The past few weeks I have started to feel extreme cramping and pelvic pain. It has been so bad, that I literally can not move off of the couch or bed. I have seen my doctor and been tested for many different things. They moved up my anatomy scan and obviously everything looked great on that. But the pain has just been so bad, really unbearable at times. I saw the doctor again yesterday and FINALLY got some answers! She thinks I have pretty severe Sciatica and that it is very possible I have some sort of separation in my pubic bone. Unfortunately I can’t have an x-ray until after the baby is born so we won’t be able to know for sure. She said these conditions are pretty rare, so of course I would have to deal to with them. So typical for me! There is no quick fix for these conditions, you really are just putting bandaids on until after baby and doing things to make yourself as comfortable as possible. She referred me to a physical therapist and a chiropractor, I also have to wear one of those ugly belts around my hips to help pull them in! Haha, oh my gosh! She said this will mostly likely get worse as baby gets bigger so to just hang in there and hope that some of these remedies relieve a little of the pain. My pain has been so bad that I haven’t been able to do my regular duties. I can hardly clean my bathroom let alone make a quick trip to the grocery store or Target. She told me that I shouldn’t push through the pain and once it starts I need to lay down and rest until it goes away so as to not do further damage. Also, thankfully these things do not hurt the baby, just me. So I guess that’s a silver lining.
If any of you sweet friends reading this have dealt with anything like this I would love to hear any advice or things that helped you. I find that this is just as much mentally and emotionally draining as it is physically. It is so hard for me to be in so much pain and be thinking of everything I need to do and not being able to do it. I also feel so guilty for not being the usual mom I am to the girls. We play a lot of Go Fish on the couch! I honestly hate being pregnant. Obviously there have been some positive things, but it has been such an incredibly tough 20 weeks. The next 4.5 months are going to be so hard, but we will get through them and obviously every thing will be completely worth it! Also a quick little shoutout to Michael, who has done so much to help. He has literally been doing everything while taking care of me and being so sweet. I have no clue what I would do without him!
Those of you who made it through, thanks so much for reading! Here’s to 20 weeks down, hopefully only 18-19 to go!!